M. rushes in to Gatehouse
Can you write down this number plate please?
Sure. What is it?
UX**43
What’s he doing?
He’s parked his van up the street and he’s wanking.
So he’s just trawling you girls so he can wank over you?
Yeah, it’s disgusting. But I banged on the window and said ‘There are little kids who live on this street, Mate. They don’t need to see that. And besides, that’s the smallest dick I’ve ever seen’.

I can’t speak for laughing.